And I feel like I'm not allowed to be upset with the kids at all right now. If I get at all frustrated with them, there is always that knowledge, lingering in the background of everyone's mind, that in just a few days I'll be on my own with them for a month straight. And I know that is what people are thinking when I say anything about the kids right now.
So I feel pretty stressed out trying to get everything done and stay organized about it all, without feeling like I can vent about the kids' behavior or any frustrations I am experiencing.
And the more I hear things like, "You'll probably have to come home early" and "That's a long time to be away from home" and "It's really irresponsible and unsafe for you to try to do this without your husband" the more likely I am to dig in my heels even if things get bad and be stubborn about proving everyone wrong. I can see it now: we'll be there in our tent in the middle of hurricanes and thunderstorms, everyone will be cold and wet and miserable, and begging to go home, bitten up by mosquitos and sunburned on the beach, and I won't be able to take them home. But it won't be my fault. I can't let anyone be right about me not being able to do this. ;)
This is what I don't understand: What if I was a single mom? What if I didn't have the option of having anyone else along to help? Would we just be expected to stay home forever and never do anything? Or would we just not be allowed to do the 'adventurous' things without a man? I just don't understand that thought process at all. What if I was a man? Would it be ok to do adventurous things without my wife?
I figure - I have 80 or 90 years, tops, to live on this Earth. Why would I let something as small as having to do something alone keep me from living?!
Jenny, just so you know, I think you're incredibly awesome. Yeah, it's hard on your own, but who cares? How boring would life be if it was totally easy all the time? Do I think you're a little nuts? Sure. ;) But in a totally good, "wow, what an amazing woman" kind of way. (As you know, I'm close to pulling my hair out with just two kids, and that's with help! But that has nothing to do with your situation; it's 100% me. How egocentric would I be to apply my experiences and abilities to your family?)
ReplyDeleteYou can always vent to me.
I think it's great that you are planning such a cool trip with your family!!!
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing mom. We are all riddled with our own batch of self-doubts... some people just find it reassuring to point out those of other people instead of reflecting on their own. Have a wonderful trip!
ReplyDeleteHmmm...let's think about this...
ReplyDelete1) You've planned extensively for the trip.
2) You have extra funds for emergencies.
3) You've had experience with tent living.
4) Your kids are old enough to help out.
5) You have a cell phone and plenty of people to call.
6) You know how to read maps.
7) Your kids listen to you.
8) You think clearly in emergencies.
9) You don't take unnecessary risks.
10) You have anticipated problems and generated solutions.
Etcetera!
So to all those negative people, smile sweetly and say, "Thanks for your concern, but we've already addressed that issue."
And then go out there and have a wonderful time!